YOooo, what do i doooo??

I should really do something that other people will consider helpful… But WHAAAT??? Ok, so like, since tomorrow is gonna be June, I just realized that I have 4 more weeks of school. And my sister’s birthday is coming up and I kinda need to make a card for her.
What do I DOOOO????
BUUT, I will go to the PNE once again this year. Man, the Awards Ceremony thing for Intermediates is like in 2 or 3 weeks from now. I know that I’ll have at least one award. That’ll be the SERVICE Award. I Safety Patrol and Lunch Monitor. Even if I do 2 services, I only get credited for one of them. But it’s added to it altogether, and I’ll still get recognized.

Just, saying, even after going to the Fun Fair by my school, my self-esteem had not gotten any better than before. I still am the same person. Of course I can’t change myself by going to a single event, but I kind of thought I could see the way I do things a little differently after having a little bit of fun. Whatever. Well, I tried, didn’t exactly work, so I won’t try it again. But now, I have this other question.

What is Self-Esteem?

Damn. Now this seems like some kind of speech. Or essay. Or a script for some kind of debate. But it ain’t. So… I’m gonna have to go now. See ya next time when I rant here again!!

woaah, wait up

Heyyy there! ‘Tis have been a while! But alas, I’m back! So… I dunno what I should do here… Uhh. Yeah. Sports Day is coming up. And tomorrow is my school’s Fun Fair! OMG, wooow. This’ll be here just as a small update. NOWWW. I gotta go. See ya around!

Summer Resolutions

Okay, so I got this idea from my sister, Grace, and, uh, it is basically a list of things i kind of want to achieve over the Summer. So, uhm, HERE IT IS!

1) Write something acceptable…
2) Learn to do something cool
3) Improve my table tennis skills
4) Find my inner creativity
5) Look at things differently (and not copy so much)
6) Read books
7) Ignore put downs
8) Just be more positive
9) Improve grammar … ?
10) Draw more often (to let that creativity goooo)
11) Try to be mature
12) Pay more attention………..

See? I can see a lot of flaws in myself. I still have more. But, since I am turning 12 this year, I’ll just stop at 12. I have another one: write neater. SEEEEEEEEE??? okay…
Well then, I need to go. It is 9:30-ish. See ya next time!!!


Let’s go to the normal updates. ehehe. By the way, that rant earlier was 641 words long and took me about 10 minutes to type. Impressive hey? That’s one thing I am better at than my friends; typing fast. But not as fast as some of the grade sevens in my class.
At school we have determined the teams for Sports Day. I am on the Red Bulls team. Isn’t that like, copyrighted? Eh, we’re not selling anything with that name anyways. There are two teams with the same name thing. Since the theme this year is WESTERN, the Yellow Bandits, and the Blue Bandits. Green is the Green Beans of the West. Of course! “OF THE WEST”, just add that, and anything works. It’s Western enough.
Whatever. I should go and do something helpful. But, once again, self-esteem/self-confidence seem to get in the way again. Therefore, I won’t. But, I’ll try. Once? Twice? Twice upon a time? Nope.

Well, I’ll get going. See ya next time!

my lowered self-esteem

you do know what that means, right? hopefully. well, then let’s get a move on with that. i have a low self-esteem. i just can’t seem to type or write something that will be accepted into society as “good”. i look at my friends and they have something always better than me. what can i do? study? work damn hard? those are obvious. but no matter how much more i study, they are always better than me. ‘maybe you aren’t learning anything from studying’, ‘maybe you’re studying wrong’, ‘maybe you’re just not cut out for this’, ‘maybe you’re naturally like this, you can’t absorb information’, ‘you’re just plain stupid’. yes. yes. yes! it’s oneself’s fault. always.

so if i go like this in front of those friends, i foolishly chose to compare myself to, they don’t understand. it’s because i think too much?!?! maybe. but it’s completely true. they get asked to do cool things. they get these opportunities offered to them because they are ‘qualified’ as humans. they have connections, and that’s all that is getting them around in this ‘living’ thing that is going on for these mammals we call ourselves. homo sapiens sapiens are supposed to be the smart ones, right? no? oh, alright, i get it. the ones that “look” qualified are “probably” not? i just really want to swear really loudly right now. but i can’t. i’ll look like a “fool”.

damn it. this is what i get for helping my friends beat up people for them. since they are “helpless” when it comes to “power”. right? because of all this i have always been very hesitant when it comes to making friends. i can’t make friends until they approach me first. but the first friend i made at my new school 3 years ago now hates me because she betrayed me. not really. she hates me for always being with the friends i am with now. so why am i telling this out to the world? i want to complain. i want to yell. i want to beat someone up. so what good will this do? it won’t do anything. what will change after this? nothing. maybe i’ll feel slightly relieved. maybe if i play some great catchy songs on repeat.

what am i gonna write next? i don’t know. i don’t where this is heading. but this very fun and satisfying. i can now do something i think i am good at. yep, it’s called ranting to myself. and whomever would bother themselves to read this blurb of crap. this post has a problem. but no verdict. oh well. what am i gonna do with my “creativity”? my friends all agree that all i’m worth is beating boys up that annoy them. sure, i’m tall. sure, i run pretty fast. sure, i can talk back at them quickly. sure, do i look that frightening. i hope not. some people forget that i am the same as them. i still have emotions. i can cry. i can get really mad to the verge of crying. i can really like something. i can “feel”.

nobody i know will see this anyways and change the way people see me. i don’t care. okay, maybe i do care. i’m probably just over-thinking it. well, would you look at that. i am crying as i type this. great. wonderful. absolutely perfect. just as planned.


that was very refreshing. now let me push you off a bridge.

Add New Post

Heeeyy! Today I did the Gauss Math Contest!! It was pretty complicated. I know that i got at least two questions wrong. It was like the first thing in the morning.
Math + Mornings + Gloria = Error_TRY AGAIN LATER
So yeah. I ain’t great in the morning. But today I woke up an hour earlier for the sake of waking up in time to be fully conscious. Ain’t that just DANDY?

ANYWAYs, I know. The title has very little meaning to anything here. But, eh, ya know, as the years go by, and you start using up the names for the blogging and then you’re like, what should today’s title be and then you have absolutely no idea and then you go, never mind let’s not do this blog post because I don’t have a damn title, and you’re lost when you don’t have a title, because then you can’t find that certain post unless it has a bunch of numbers or empty space. And it is the only one of it’s kind. Woah. That was kind of long. I should really go rant somewhere else.

Well then, I’ll get going on that. See ya later!!


Okay. HI! We had our first Sports Day meeting with only the intermediate students. I’m.. as anticipated, on the RED team. But this time I am at last with one of my friends on the same team. But I am also on the same team as my arch nemesis. JKJK but… YEAH. And the team name is terrible. RED BULLS? REALLY?!? I know the theme this year is Western, but you don’t have to go so far to say BULLS! So many other things you could have chosen! But the majority say BULLS! My goodness! My generation is doomed! JKJK, but once again… YEAH.

Okay, I’m gonna have to get going. SEE YA NEXT TIME!!

I really should.


So… I should really put something of mine out into this large world of ours. Like write something that’s actually good and acceptable, and of course with great grammar. I suck at grammar stuff. And I suck at writing. Piece them together, and you’ve got the worst story or piece of writing in the world. Ehehh. Well ain’t that just SNAZZY.

You know how last post I said my typing was slower than I had remembered? It’s true… BUT. I still type faster than any of my friends. I type hella fast compared to them. Maybe it’s because of all the finger exercises I do each day. JKJK, I don’t even do finger exercises. I don’t even know if there is such a thing. There probably is. But I haven’t seen anything like it yet.

Anyways, it’s MAYYY!! Damn. That means my friend’s birthday is coming up. And I need to make a card. So… I gotta go. BYE. Seeeeee yaaaaa laaaaaaaaaaterrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!